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Yes, I made a grave mistake. I wanted to download a codec pack. Not a problem you say? I beg to differ, especially when you're faced with multiple attempts at slipping you unwanted third-party software to get your money! Put on your Indiana Jones hat and prepare for the whimsical world of malware!
Originally, I had only planned to perform a Google search, visit a download portal and download the file. But once I got there I found not one download button but six. And none of them linked to the codec pack. You don't have to be a genius to suspect foul play but what software was really behind those buttons and where was the wanted download?
Where others would cancel the endeavor we'll boldly take a look at the unloved stepchildren and dark corners of the software industry. My jittery mouse pointer went to the first download button.
I was greeted by ConvertYa* that gleefully took up a prominent spot in my browser. This toolbar could supposedly perform file conversion and the integrated radio played a reggae channel from Kenya that at least made for a joyful multi-cultural atmosphere. Aside from that, there were no other noteworthy features but the solemn promise not to collect and hand out personal data to anyone. You can have all that online with more options, underwhelming and superfluous.
The Reply* start page on the other hand was a genuine nuisance. The first page of search results was always ads-only, even using "pope" as search term brought up heaps of collectibles, books, trips to Israel and prayer watches. Image previews were highly pixelated and often distorted, giving the Holy Father a few pounds more than necessary. Good riddance! But there were many other candidates. StupidSearch* really stood out. Broken images, links to shooting games and potency-enhancing drugs helped establish a deep trust from the start. I also won an iPad, a club-footed soccer player wanted to show me the latest sports results and comic book girls allowed for a deep look at their cleavages - a sight to behold, who wouldn't have blithely given out their credit card information right away!
But before you could do anything, Firefox felt uncomfortable and crashed. On came a real treat for nerds: Zombie-News! This program supposedly searches international news offerings for zombie invasions and provides timely warnings the minute the undead rally up in your neighborhood. Sounded immensely useful and was installed promptly but has remained invisible ever since, shame.
Delicate* was behind another download, a company that took no chances and installed ten programs at once. I still had loads of hard disk space left so what the heck!
I definitely liked Angry Optimizer* because it so deftly reminded me of its presence through epilepsy inspiring blinking at each system start. To cancel the registration you had to click "Ausfahrt" (German for exit ramp) which is what you get for blindly relying on Google Translator, I guess. The offered system scan revealed the true extent of my calamity: 1005 privacy risks, 908 invalid registry entries and tons of junk data, alas without details on the exact location on my freshly set up hard disk, no doubt to subtly affect my buying decision. At least the application identified itself as a threat, an honest display of good will.
Bubu Browser* launched without a hitch and even used Google as its start page but unfortunately led me to various sites that tried to install even more dubious software. The promise of being an "anti-spy browser" sounded like false advertising indeed. And the eerie advertising links for easy cash, more impressive genitals or cures for cancer embedded in every text did not exactly brighten the picture.
Loser Fix* pretended to be a serious analysis tool but not surprisingly found my freshly set up Windows 7 installation in a sorry state. But the praises it sang for my installed hard disk and processor was a welcome change in light of all the bad news. Surprisingly, the crash of the installer was one of the reported threats, a bitter self-realization no doubt. I was presented with a risk assessment (high) and a US-based hotline where someone would hopefully recommend ridding my system of this software misery altogether.
Enter NoneProtect*. Surreptitiously launched in the background, a small window came up announcing that I had 55.207 personal files, on my newly installed test system mind you. For only $59.99, I would receive a remedy, exactly what wasn't shown. The good news was that all data plans came with unlimited backup space, a small comfort at this time. While I was pondering throwing money down the drain for once, another window opened notifying me with a sense of urgency to download another optimizer tool because my system was still at risk. I had already roughly 6 such tools on my machine, apparently not enough.
By now, I had completely lost track of which program did what, the junk applications had taken over. Once I ignored the blinking, my anonymous visitors tried several baits: I was to receive an exclusive gift worth $2000, get to know floozies from my neighborhood and to speak my mind outright as part of a survey. So much to do at the end of my day! Just as I tried to close the browser I was heartwarmingly begged to stay! All that was missing was a picture of a sadly looking dog to change my mind. But the next highlight was just around the corner.
As the colorful FailReg Cleaner Deluxe* launched, I bid farewell to my retina and watched as it rapidly plowed through my system only to proclaim the inevitable: my Windows was doomed. Recommended action: Embarrassment now (Google Translator strikes again)?! And who wouldn't blush like a schoolgirl in this situation? Once I rebooted, I was presented with the current level of system destruction before another browser launched, offering me the same application at 2$ less, nice to see the customer is still king!
Even if taken with a bit of humor, the longer I stared at these applications the more they got on my nerves. Not a single one of them was worth their (often high) price. Weren't there any trustworthy applications that got the job done? There are many useful and professional applications available but producing them is hard work! If companies rely on fear and uncertainty alone to sell your applications you're definitely doing something wrong. You system will appear remotely controlled, browser windows will pop up by themselves, ads will appear at every corner and don't even get me started on the privacy incursions involved. These aren't simple desktop icons that you can delete with a single click and their setups don't provide a means of unselecting these bundled applications. Even experienced users will find it nearly impossible to work their way through and endless mess of texts, checkboxes and tabs to avoid their installation. Download portals that force this dangerous junk on their visitors shouldn't be surprised when their visitors are leaving in droves!
Btw, I found the wanted download link hidden at the bottom in (very) small print.
Important: All these program were installed on a test machine. Unless you have a lot of time on your hands and nerves of steel, do not try this at home. Many of these programs will try to nag and scare you into buying them and they are highly resistant to any uninstallation attempts. If you prefer to stay on the safe side, Ashampoo Antivirus flagged each of my installations as a threat. For the sake of this article, I have ignored those warnings.
*some names were altered to avoid legal disputes with lawyers from around the world
I only download from http://www.majorgeeks.com always safe then. ;)
I use Ashampoo Antivirus, which I like.
I've had this problem too with a program called GetStarted. exe. On those occasions I've inadvertently installed this, I removed it smartly. It took over firefox, making searches and on-line transactions impossible.
You do need to be careful, but sometimes, with so many programs on the Internet, it is easy to get caught out.
Been there, done that...I thought I was so careful to say no or pass on the offered software as I was attempting to install a program from a reputable site...But I was still facing a ton of malware and ads that were constantly interupting my browser and my time...I went thru the add and remove programs and did find some that downloaded on the same date...got rid of all of them...Then I kept what I thought were good honest, malware free programs...My anti malware program from system mechanic found most of the others...but it was down to going through all the program files to find the rest...took me awhile, but I got them all...Learned my lesson and protect my computer with some very good programs that do what they're supposed to do.l..
i have had similer experiances i am sick and tiard of sites installing unwanted software even linux software sites are not immune to the ploy [i had a start page change on me and i cannot get it to change back] google is not the answer i prefer use other search engines with less adds and better results and less bad sites , at least with linux i have less malware . now if only more software writers would write for linux i could get rid of my window partitions and be better off
Apart from the spurious download buttons which do NOT lead to the application you wish to install, when you have clicked on the correct download link it is still necessary to uncheck any "tick " boxes on the installer window which offer to download other applications that you don't want. Before you finally get to install the app., you may see up to half a dozen such windows, so READ everything very carefully.
Another much more insidious ploy which caught me out once, is to embed your agreement to download unwanted items (which, by the way are nowhere mentioned) in the EULA. When you click "I agree to the terms and conditions" (or similar) you have just opened Pandora's Box.
I found this out the hard way; after a long, nightmarish process of getting rid of the junk and being a glutton for punishment I tried reinstalling the same software as I was sure that I hadn't clicked any wrong buttons or left any "tick" boxes checked. That left only the EULA which I read thru' this time and there it was !! Needless to say I quit at that point.
Fortunately this one seems to be quite rare but it is around. Also,try a web search for reviews of any software you are thinking of installing.
None at the moment.....
Thanks for the memories! So many times I've been plagued with the non-stop popups, ads, and downright annoying browers.
I got Ashampoo a while back and am so glad I did. I haven't had one bit of problem since. Each and every week the program runs in the background and gets rid of all the accumulated junk.
Thank you for getting this fantastic product out.
A loyal user!
Ashampoo and Emsisoft do not need a firewall, the Windows firewall has been proven to be more than sufficient for the needs of every user....and why may you ask.....why would Emsisoft or Ashampoo IT specialists want to waste time creating their own firewall when the Windows firewall operates at 100%, capacity.
Ashampoo and Emsisoft are among the most honest, trustworthy and honourable, members of the very few trustworthy producers of antivirus/antimalware programmes for the world's computer users.
There is a great risk involved with using 'freeware', it is never 'free', it always costs the users more than a few portions of money by using it.
Ich danke Ihnen für das, was Sie tun,
We also think very highly of Bitdefender that’s why they’re our second provider for up-to-date virus signatures. :)
While I've been a long time Avast user and found its detection to be first rate, recent tests gave the nod to Panda Free AV. I'm presently evaluating that on a non-production computer.
Also, to help catch at least some of those annoying installation hitchhikers, take a look at unchecky from http://wwwnchecky.com.
that is why I dropped zone alarm. You must accept to switch your search engine to yahoo, and I don't remember what else. So, end of a long relationship with them.
Hi Sven,
A great article, funny but based on the truth.
I love the big download buttons, I see them as big blocks of coloured stone to fall over and avoid while seeking the 'real' and 'honest' small download link or button.
I have been using the Emsisoft garbage and bug destroyer for a few years, the best of the best in AV-Lab tests, the only one I trust after many problems with other antivirus/antimalware programmes.
However, as I have many Ashampoo programmes, I am waiting to see Ashampoo Antivirus is a test situation.
Oh dear! I think most of us have been there before. Yes the plethora of unrelated download buttons is a pain, but it doesn't end there.
With every download, I will only do custom install - yes there they are at every step - another box to uncheck so I don't get junk. Having said that I have still been hit once or twice with PUP's.
Thanks for the entertainment.
Will Ashampoo develop a free software that warns the user what these programs do BEFORE the download button is hit? Better yet, stop the button click altogether, at least until after additional warnings and necessary keystrokes are given and used.
Cheers!
NR
Washington DC
Hi, I am not a dependent Tester of Anti-virus Products. Your product slightly doesn't hold out to the good Antivirus. You are defined, what you want to let out, various programs or the Antivirus? That - that you fastened third-party cursors from third-party the producer doesn't do you by the Anti-virus company! There are many brands of Antiviruses which use third-party anti-virus engines, but they are good fellows and products at them worthy, the same Tencent, Qihoo. And your product not serious. It is better to deliver to Bitdefender Internet Security 2015, on the stock, and they are constant... Alas your product didn't impress.
i can relate to the artical as my browser startup page has been hijacked by an wanted search page ,i receve email years later from an other company when all i did is visit their web site and didnt buy anything [but my comp is going to disolve-explode if i dont buy X program] , and teying to buy a simple program is a maze of links that go nowhere but their site, and i receave 75+ spam emails a day [i now deleat 90 per cent of my emails automaticly ] and unsubsribe link get you nowhere . what a world we live in
iain
If Ashampoo uses the Emsisoft engine, does that mean it also uses the same virus and malware signatures and definitions database?
Is there also an Ashampoo firewall? I ask, since Emsisoft stopped providing support for theirs, even though it was top of the line - and it's somewhat difficult finding a replacement.
We are using the antivirus engine and signatures provided by Emsisoft but not their firewall. We are planning to include our own firewall in future versions.
Entertaining article.
Have been doing tech work on computers for a few decades and really enjoyed your article. It doesn't matter how many times I tell people to use a trusted website they end up calling me. One new computer had 10 toolbars hogging the system resources. Most, but not all, the problems can be stopped by going slow on the install. Watch for the check box or skip buttons as they may halt the installation of as you say "calamity" sets in.
I already have almost every Ashampoo product. My lifetime subscription with SuperAntiSpyWare keeps my desktop out of harms way.
This is the first Ashampoo blog I have received, It was to true, funny and a sober reminder of the risks of using unfamiliar download sites.
Thank you
Thanks for the good laugh. I've lost track of how many friends and family computers I've had to clean up and then tell their owners "Stop clicking things!" Even computer savvy people can find themselves dealing with this sort of thing... they're just usually too embarrassed to admit it.
Good article.. It's happened to all of us one time or an other, not fun getting rid of all that C**P though. I use I Orbit driver Booster pro, it find all outdated drivers and drivers you can search for, People be careful what you click on!! it could cost you Big Bucks to get rid of it.
Clicked onto this blog page and my Panda Security Software immediately announced that it had prevented a virus from downloading! Turned out to be Malware in the form of Doubleclick! Obviously you're not practicing what you preach guys!
Not guilty your honor! :) But seriously, we’re safe. Nonetheless, we’d still like to know why Panda Antivirus is issuing a false alert. Would you be so kind to contact our support about this?
Thanks Sven, you gave me a great laugh (even though the scenario is all too true to be funny) and I admire the subtle little non-blinking, no bonus or prize or free floozies ad for your antivirus program at the bottom!
For future reference, the only legit site for codecs, that I have ever used, is codecguide.com.
As for AV... I have a full version of AVG, but after reading some information provided via a hacker team (http://ht.transparencytoolkit.org/KnowledgeBase/-%20AV%20Test%20Summary%20-%20%5DHT%5B%20%3A%3A%20KnowledgeBase%20Product.html), I think I am going back to Avast. I don't see Ashampoo anywhere on the list, and that's neither good nor bad, but it doesn't ensure me of the safety of my files.
@Ian Next time your system is infected with anything, try doing a rollback first. Then search (on a different computer) for an anti-malware toolkit which will work off a USB. Both Avast and Emsisoft are pretty good about providing free software in this case.
It was no accident - this time. :) I intentionally installed all this junk on my machine to write up something humorous for you to enjoy. Naturally, everything was done in a test environment with full system restore just one click away. And by the way – Ashampoo Antivirus also uses the Emsisoft engine.
A very well written piece and if it wasn't so true it would be funny..it was funny tho.. Reminds me of the time when Ashampoo antivirus AND another antiviral software I was running, both flashed up warnings not to run an exe file that looked the genuine article , but I blithely "entered" through all the instructions, and ended up with "cryptolock ???" virus/malware capturing my whole system.
$600(aus) later now I am a wiser person albeit a little less financial. It was a horrifying experience. I do what Ashampoo antivirus tells me now
Ian